Monday, May 12, 2008

The talent I do not have. . .

That's right,there is acutally one.

Saturday night Ryan and I got a sitter and drove with Meme and Pat a million miles out to Cumming (Boondocks, literally, as it is near the lake.)to attend our friend Eric's 40th surprise birthday party. I have known Eric about 10 years. He is really Pat's friend from middle school but is part of the loser clan. Despite knowing him this long I have never met his parents-- or, I come to find out-- a lot of his friends. You know, different groups and I guess he keeps his separate. And I think, after Saturday, he may never mix groups again.
Despite not knowing many people I, of course, had a blast. But not knowing people never gets in my way of good time. Really, let's face it; not much gets in the way of me having a good time. When Eric's mother Edie introduced herself to me she confided that Eric hated things that put attention on him. I told her not worry because I am entirely comfortable with attention on me and would appropriately divert any attention Eric did not want onto me. I don't think she really believed me but I was, as always, true to my word. You know, that "all the world's a stage" mentality. I fully embrace it.

I made Eric's sister Dana make him a fancy hat that he kept taking off and I kept putting it back on his head.

Then we gave him a really great gift--a nose and ear hair remover and Meme also added some Prostate health herbs. I even made him card and wrote a great poem about ear and nose hair and a healthy prostate. I really think it made him feel good to know he had such great friends looking out for his prostate and embarrassing nose and ear hair. See, that's just the kind of friends we are.

A bit later at the party I was with a group of girls and I don't know how the subject came up but we started talking about what I call Meme's poker face. It is so not a poker face. Meme is always very polite and proper but you can always tell exactly what she is thinking because of her wild arching eyebrow that belies every word out of her mouth. For example Bubbles will say something like, "I am going to have Easter at my house and serve lamb and mint jelly,"gag. And Meme will say "Wow, that sounds awesome. What can I bring?" But what she is really thinking and what her one raised eyebrow is saying is: "Oh my God. I hate lamb and everybody knows that mint jelly is the most foul, green gelatinous substance on earth."

Me? I just say exactly what I am thinking because-- and I have to think it is because my face is so perfectly symmetrical that my facial muscles can't help but work so beautifully together-- I cannot do the one up, one down. And of course it annoys me that Meme has this talent so I always rat her out when I catch her making the poker face. Like, I'll say, "Wow Bubbles that would be great! I think lamb and mint jelly just sounds delicious but you know, Meme's eyebrow doesn't think so. I think maybe some roasted turkey might be nice. You know, to make Meme's eyebrow happy." That's right. I toss her under the mother-in law-bus and I have no bones about it because trust me: She does the same thing to me given the chance.

So at the party we were discussing Meme's poker face and I started asking the girls if they could do it. Some could, some couldn't but everyone's face was absolutely hysterical while trying to find out if they could. So me? I took pictures. Of everyone. And everyone obliged.
The shy birthday boy:


Rachel, Eric's wife:

Other party guests:

The next day at Bubbles house-- where we celebrated Mother's Day with, Praise Jesus! Not lamb and mint jelly but hot dogs and hamburgers--everyone gave the ole one up one down a try:

The queen herself of the wild arching eyebrow, Bubbles:
I try again:

Little Pat:
And Beau:
Ryan, again. Clearly, the master archer.

Somehow Poppy escaped as I don't have one of him but I bet he can do it. But what I want to know is can you do the wild arching one eyebrow raise? If so I want to see proof on your blog. . .


  1. That is hilarious.

    Alas, I have tried it before and I just look silly as both my eyebrows act in unison-- most I might do is squint one eye.

  2. I embarrass myself when I try to do this... I can only imagine the pain you would feel. No need to thank me for sparing you :-)

  3. Loved the pictures! I'm playing along on my blog. ;)

  4. You are officially the biggest freak ever. Also, I don't think you ever sleep. Ever.

    Will try to get an arching brow shot when I can, but we all know that I am not a good liar and just blurt out that mint jelly sucks ass.