Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Butt Plug

Eye-catching lead, isn't it?

Okay, so I know I have mentioned Beau's speech issues many times and how they result in many, many misunderstandings--kitty poops anyone?

And you know, I could choose to be really sad about it every time we have communication break downs because it is sad and frustrating and just heartbreaking that such a smart little boy is having such a hard time getting his ideas across. Big huge sigh though, as with everything else in life it is just easier if you try to find the humor and laugh about it and move on. So that is what I have chosen to do.

Yesterday on the ride home from school Beau and Parker were talking play dates and Parker said he wanted to have a sleepover at my house (Parker is working his way to living at my house I think). I pointed out for the 1 millionth time that they are too young for sleepovers. But nonetheless the topic persisted. And Beau said something to the effect that Parker could do something with a "butt plug". It was all garbled but I clearly heard "butt plug." (Sorry no links, too inappropriate, go Google for yourself if you have any questions.)

Butt plug? Surely that is not what he said.

So not entirely certain of what I heard and most definitely not wanting to repeat the taboo yet very popular with the sandbox set word "butt"-- much less the combination of "butt plug" -- I asked him to repeat what he said.

Again, it was garbled but my ears clearly heard what sounded exactly like "butt plug."

Parker too heard something amiss as he too asked Beau to say it again.

And again it sounded like "butt plug."

So not really believing that my 3 year old has any real understanding of what a butt plug is but most definitely very interested in finding out what he thinks a butt plug is and exactly how on earth it relates to a sleepover, I asked him to explain what he meant and show me if he could.

So Beau, slightly exasperated at having to explain-- yet again-- something that is apparently quite simple; mimed the motion for sleep and said something to the effect that he will sleep up on the top butt and Parker will sleep on the bottom butt.

Light bulb over my head flicks brightly on.


Me: Ohhhhhh! You and Parker will sleep in your bunk bed!!! You on the top bunk and Parker on the bottom bunk?

Beau: YES!!!!

Parker: YES!!!

Me, crossing myself with relief: Uhm yeah, maybe when you guys are 5 or something. So hey, Parker, want to come play at our house today?


  1. That is too cute. I think Beau should send you to hearing therapy ;-) Surely he realizes by now that the problem is not his, but everybody else's!

  2. Whew! Glad you cleared THAT up! Now, I just have to wait until I get home to google and see what a real "bunk bed" is. . .

  3. Reminds me of the old t.v. show with Art Letterman, "Kids say the darnest things!" I had to take speech therapy in First Grade (My speech was confusing...step father had a Polish accent, my mother had a Kentucy hillbilly accent). There is hope, I'm somewhat coherent

  4. I was laughing at this one...well...I laugh at most...but this was so cute!

    Steph...a bunk bed is where you have...oh, nevermind...go ahead and google it, but beware!

    Bruce, I think you mean Art Linkletter...I'm that know things like this!

  5. *delurks*

    When our youngest was 3-4 (now 7), he used to call flip flops, "f*ck ups." Your story reminded me of that and I had to give him a big hut.

  6. Wes--it is the all the pool water in my ears. And Beau is incredibly patient with me. I am obviously doing as well in Beau Latin as I did in real Latin.

    Steph--I love you. You are such an innocent.

    Bruce and Charlie--you are both old. I have no idea who this Art Letterman or Linkletter is. Bruce I know you are smarty pants--Mr. Chess Master. From what the "experts" tell me Beau should be fine and I think it is just a combination of his dad having dyslexia and being a descendent from a family riddled with Engineers--he is all right brained or is it left brained? Whichever, he is my little problem solver and Carmella my president of the UN.

    Lauren--Hi and welcome! Carmella use to say hip hops but the f*cks ups are way funnier. Beau's speech can be very frustrating but it does give me a daily chuckle and is cute as all get out. You should hear him sing.

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