Hey Lance, There's a New Yellow Jersey in Town

While Beau didn't get his adult bike for his birthday he did get a new outfit, complete with gloves, shorts, jersey, bike light and water bottle.
Last night at dinner I told the kids that today was going to be big bike day for them. At least 10 miles.

They've done 10 miles before but it took forever. My goal is to get them to where they are riding at least my marathon goal pace for 12-15 miles--around 8 minute miles-- without tons of superfluous stopping. They've got the pace, just not without lots of breaks.

So I put the kids to bed and Carmella went to sleep but Beau kept coming to ask me a bazillion questions.

Like what?

Well, he asked for bike shoes. He complained that he didn't have any and he knows I have special shoes for my bike. I explained they don't make bike shoes for kids, especially 5 year olds. His vans would work just fine. I've seen tons cyclists wear vans. Some prefer it, I said. It is what is done, I told him.

Then he brought me his bike shorts--apparently he likes to lay his outfit out just like his Mommy does--to pull the tags off. I pulled the tags off and shuffled him back to bed.

He was back a few minutes later--clearly after inspecting and contemplating bike shorts. He asked, "Uh, Mommy, do you wear underwear with bike shorts?"

Me: No. Now: Go.To.BED!

Beau, stock still with blank look and giant saucer eyes stares at me. Blinking twice. He is such a freaking cartoon. Not to self: Limit TV.

Me: Go to BED!!!!

Beau: (ignoring me) Do you wear underwear with your bike shorts?

Me: No. It is all commando.It is what all the serious cyclist do. Go to bed. NOW!!!!

And he shuffles back to bed to contemplate this no underwear thing.

Then this morning while he ate his breakfast he told me he needed the butt paste.

Butt paste?

Well, it is actually the chamois butter. The kids are fascinated by it. When I rode the Cartersville Century Dani gave me a tube of it. The kids found it in my car and asked about it.

The conversation went like this:

Beau: What's this? ( holding up tube of chamois butter)

Me: It is Chamois butter.

Carmella: Where did you get it?

Me: My friend Dani gave it to me.

Beau: What is (garbled) butter?

Me: It is creme you put on your bike shorts so you don't chafe.

Blank looks from kids.

Me: (trying to clarify) It is butt paste. Keeps your bottom feeling good when you ride the bike for a long time.

Carmella: You have friends that give you butt paste?

Me: Uh, yeah. She was looking out for my parts.

Beau: What parts? Your penis?

Me: Beau, girl's don't have penises. We've covered this. Never mind. Look! Over there. It's Sponge Bob Square Pants.

So anyway, Beau asked for the butt paste this morning. For his bike he said.

Oh, I said. You don't put the butt paste on your bike. You put it in your shorts or on your, uhm . . . butt.

Beau was quiet and then said, never mind. I don't want any.

He excitedly put his outfit on and we headed out to the trail.
And instead of 10 miles we did 12. Only 2 breaks! Time spent running (me) and biking(Carmella and Beau) was around 1:37. 8:10 minute mile pace, in 86 degree weather no less. My kids? They kicked ass.

Beau though did drive me batty with his bike questions and endless chatter:
Beau:Mommy, who's your bike partner?
Me:Ms. Stephanie.
Beau: She's faster than you? You're the slow poke?
Me: Ah, no, we are about the same. We are both equally slow.
Beau: Does she have a better bike?
Me: Uh, yeah, probably. It is a different bike.
Beau: A road bike?
Me: No a tri bike.
Beau: What's a tri bike? Is it a tricycle?
Me: No. Uh, it's a road bike that is different than mine.
Beau: Faster?
Me: Sometimes.
Beau: So she is faster.

Meanwhile, Carmella is riding about 100 feet in front of us pretending she doesn't know us and looks completely bored.


And later Beau catches back up to me after riding about 15 feet behind me for a mile or so:
Beau: I ran over an orange snake Mommy.
Me: What!? When?
Beau: Back there.
Me: OhMyGod! Did it bite you? Did it arch up at you?
Beau: No. It . . . and mimes snake tongue and hissing sound
Me: Uh, that is a copperhead and they are poisonous. Do NOT run over ANY snakes.
Beau: Why?
Me: Because they will bite you and you will die.

And even later:
Beau: Is Uncle Wes's bike faster than yours?
Me: Yes. Wes is A LOT faster than me.
Beau: And he rides on the road?
Me: Yes.
Beau: When I am an adult. Like when I am 8, I am going to ride on the road.
Me: Okay. Can we not talk? It is hard for Mommy to keep talking.
Beau: Is it because you are slow?
Me: Yes. ( but thinks, f-off)

And even though he is 5 I do think the Mainstay needs to be worried. Apparently Beau has us on his radar. Clearly, he has decided I am NOT competition but the Mainstay and Stephanie are.

I mean checkout the Mainstay with his game face:

And look here is Beau with his:



But most importantly Beau refuels with water, Gatorade and pbj sandwiches. Not PBR like the Mainstay:

Yeah, you're going down. But uh, good luck on Sunday!

The Mainstay's New Team Photo

He's giving up the titanium and carbon and trading in his Pacesetter Steel ride for a Townie. Better look now because he'll be so blazing fast at the crits that you won't even catch a glimpse.
Note: Mainstay's preferred hydration system is Coors. His helmet is specifically designed for beach aerodynamics. And that is not a specialized jersey or socks he is wearing. We are hoping the tan works itself out by the end of the week but if not that's cool too. Sort of completes the whole look.

Also, Sarah and I really hope it is genetic. Sorry Lala but I am taking you down. You look good.
People. The woman is 58 (as of last Sunday). Also, Happy Anniversary to her and Pop. 39 years.

So, yeah. We are having a great time:

.

Last night was my night to cook. I made steamed mussels for an appetizer. Had never made them before so it was a bit of an experiment. But so far no one has gotten sick



I also made spicy grilled shrimp, grilled veggies, rice and an arugula and tomato salad.

Ryan made mojitos.

Also, remember how I said I was never going to say I never? Well, here is an example of yet another one of those I never's that I said would never do but have since found myself eating the crow. Nothing big. Well fashion wise yes. It was buy or wear a gold bikini. Pookie bought it for herself but it didn't workout for her. So she gave it to me. Admittedly, I do have a bit of a bikini addiction. Some girls it is shoes. Me? Jeans and bikinis. Mind you, not necessarily together.


Okay, so I need to work on my tan lines but I did have my hair all Princess Leia'd out but the swimming in the ocean undoes things.

The Wedding of Pookie and Wes

Click here to see the wedding photos the photographer took.

Need something to do today?

Pop into Roswell for the Nalley Criterium and cheer on Wes as he races.


Hopefully, this year he didn't crack any ribs in the Twilight yesterday-- or drink too many beers afterwards-- so he can have an awesome race today.

He races at 2:30.

Good luck!

PS. Paul I don't know if you are racing or not too--but good luck to you too if you are!

The Marrying Type

See that guy there?

That is Wes.

And guess what.

He is going to be my brother in law.

Yeah! He FINALLY asked Pookie (my sister) to marry him.

Look, here I am with the happy couple. Psst I'm the blond. Pookie is the brunette though lately I think she is red. She switches her color a lot. And her hair cuts. She is a hairdresser. It is what they do. Me, who had to pretend all day that I didn't know this proposal was going down--pretend to Wes and Sarah. Wes who drove us to the race and Sarah who spent prerace with me. Wes who found me in the medical tent after the race. Wes who drove my car and who I always ask shamelessly when is he going to pop the question. I am good though and didn't say anything all day even though there were a lot of times I could have. But see, that is because I am so self involved--especially today-- that it really isn't hard for me to keep a secret since often I am too busy thinking about myself to stop and spill the beans.

Lala though? Yeah, don't tell her anything. She tells everyone. It is funny to me that she makes these sculptures. They are called Secret Keepers. Only thing she knows about a secret is how not to keep it. That, and make funny little stone heads that apparently keep secrets.

Anyway, here is the happy couple:
Congratulations. I am so happy for you guys and please don't make me wear an ugly bride's maid dress.

Race post tomorrow. I am going to bed. I just had to share the exciting news.

PS. Here is the rock and the date!: